A Simple Teddy Bear

I have to share a pretty remarkable story from school this week that touched my heart. It is one of the experiences that keeps me coming back. It has meant a lot to me and I hope other educators benefit from the story as well.

The story begins with Red Ribbon Week. As you know, this is the week we encourage students to pledge to be drug free. Each day has a theme that allows students to participate via their dress or actions. There was backwards day, team day, bring in canned foods day, bright clothing day, and pajama day. Throughout the week, my principal and myself did our best to participate. Our thinking was to enthusiastically set the tone for the entire school to show school spirit and participate in this wonderful event. It took stepping out a little, but we thoroughly enjoyed participating.

Pajama Day posed a challenge. I personally do not own pajamas that can also pass for assistant principal attire. My idea for participating was to borrow one of my childrens' teddy bears to use as a prop. Borrowing a teddy bear turned into a larger challenge than I originally envisioned. I got caught red-handed by my 2 year-old, Olivia, snagging one of her teddy bears. Olivia naturally wanted this teddy bear upon seeing me pick it up out of the corner of her room. She was not having it. I had to give it back to her and continue about getting ready for work. I  waited her out. She went back to watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. She lost focus and laid Teddy down. Like a ninja, I jumped into action, scooped up Teddy, and placed him in my work bag. All was good. Mission complete. Not so fast....my usually unaware 6th grader happens to see Teddy hanging out in dad's work bag and decides to return it to his darling, younger sister. At this point, I am trying to walk out the door to begin carpools and drop-offs. I ask Olivia if I can borrow Teddy and she says no (her favorite word). At this point I did not want to accept defeat. I still wanted to participate in PJ Day. There was only one way to make it work. I had to call in my wife for back-up. She stepped up like a champ. She quickly assessed the situation, bit the bullet, snatched Teddy from Olivia's grasp, and handed it to me. At this point, Olivia screams like a banshee. She screamed exactly like she did when she got her flu shot last Saturday. This was a fairly traumatic way to leave in the morning. It was pretty tough seeing her so distraught as I left. Long story short, I called to check on her and she had made a remarkable recovery within 2 minutes.

I greet the students at the bus lot as the bell rings. They are all wearing their pajamas. They think it is pretty cool that their assistant principal is carrying a teddy bear. Teddy is asked to give out a few hugs to kindergarten students and 1st graders. Teddy was a hit and he allowed me to participate in pajama day. It was worth the early morning drama. Then something unexpected happened.

One of my most tough, unique, and challenging 5th graders approaches me at breakfast and very earnestly asks to hold Teddy. For this blog, we will call him Freddy. At first I was defensive. I thought Freddy was being funny. I just knew this was leading somewhere inappropriate. In my mind Teddy was either going to lose his head, or "bear" minimum, learn some risky dance moves. Freddy assured me that he was serious, that he just wanted to hold on to him for the day. I explained the origins of the teddy bear. I told him who it belonged to and even the challenging story of the morning. Freddy genuinely wanted this bear. I gave in. I explained to him that I was going to walk around the school with him for a bit but that I would stop by his classroom and see if I could work something out with his teachers.

About 30 minutes later, I stop in and ask his teacher how Freddy was doing. After receiving a positive report I sat Teddy on the desk of Freddy. In a comical way, I address Teddy. I ask him to keep an eye on Freddy and to report any problems directly to me. As I walked out the door, I could already see the smile on Freddy's face. Throughout the day, I stopped by to check in on Freddy and Teddy. Each time I simply saw him holding Teddy while he was working or Freddy working with Teddy sitting on his desk. I asked his teachers how it was going and made sure that my intention was for Teddy not to be an incentive for Freddy to interrupt class. All three of his teachers assured me that it had not been a problem and that it actually seemed to help.

I went along my day. I did my normal assistant principal duties. No one seemed to mind too much that my participation in pajama day was non existent. We dismiss around 4:00. At 3:15. I stopped by Freddy's room to pick up Teddy so I could return it to my feisty two-year old. I was met with resistance. Freddy begged me to let me keep him until the end of the day. I am a softy so I agreed. "Fine, just hand him to me as you get on the bus." This made Freddy happy. Sure enough, before he loaded his bus Freddy came up to me and handed me Teddy. He noted that he didn't mess with him and thanked me.

On my way back from bus duty I reflected back on the whole incident and was floored. I could not believe the impact that this Teddy Bear had on my tough, sometimes-ornery 5th grader. I remarked to my principal on how much it seemed to mean to him. I described how he had held that Teddy Bear as if he was holding a baby brother or something else that was precious to him. I went home and shared the story with my wife (a fellow educator). The story soon touched her as much as it had touched me.

It was then that a wonderful plan was hatched. My wife handed me Teddy and said "you are taking this bear back to that school and giving him to that boy." This was not a question or a suggestion. This was going to happen. She explained that we had plenty of teddy bears and that the girls would never miss this one. We talked about how he might not have ever had a teddy bear before. The thought of a child not having a teddy bear is both inconceivable and unfortunately likely at the same time. The decision was made. Freddy would be receiving a present the next day at school. My wife carefully wrapped Teddy for Freddy and I wrote the following note:

Freddy,
Please accept this gift as a reminder that you are an exceptional, young man. You have people here at Micro Elementary who believe in you and know you will go on to do great things. Please take care of Teddy and always remember that you can do anything that you choose to do.
Sincerely,
Mr. Parrish

The next day, Freddy came to the office at an opportune time. I invited him in my office. On my desk sat his present. He sits down and clearly doesn't think the present it is for him. I tell him that the present is his. He reaches into the bag, sees what is inside, and broadly smiles. He makes a comment about having taking care of the bear yesterday and not messing it up. I told him that I knew he took good care of him and that "Teddy is yours now." He reaches further into the bag and reads my note. After a short pause, he coolly says, "thank you." The look on his face also said how appreciative he was. Freddy received a gift, but so did I.

I am as proud of this moment of any other thing I have ever done in my educational career. I believe in this moment I created a positive memory that will out live me. With the help of my wife and my two-year old, on this day, I made a difference.

    

Important Information Regarding Tomorrow (Action)

Attention All Teachers:

It is your duty to complete the following list:

1. Thank your students for being your students.
2. Fist bump or high five 100 students at your school.
3. If you see a student who is sad, mad, or alone make them smile and/or laugh.
4. Play with students at recess. Kickball is my personal favorite but don't sleep on me at Dodge Ball.
5. Learn the names of any staff members who you do not know.
6. Learn the names of 5 students who are on your hall but not in your class.
7. Tell a co-worker that they are awesome and you appreciate what they do for kids.
8. Plan an exciting lesson for next week that students will brag to their friends about.
9. Call at least two parents and brag on their children.
10. Leave your teacher bag at school when you leave for the day.

I expect a full report upon completion.

Be sure to enjoy each and every moment at school. We have the best job in the world!

Because of me

This week I challenge my peers to focus on the great contributions they are making in the world. Not just at their schools but at their homes. I want folks to celebrate the positive things that are happening in their neighborhoods because of them. The purpose is not to brag or bring attention to ourselves but to rejoice and take pride in the positive impacts that we are making. This doesn't mean we are satisfied. We are not finished products. We are all in this for the long haul and are dedicated to constant self-improvement. Celebrating our accomplishments is a way to continue the positive momentum. The goal is to keep the mojo flowing. We are celebrating on the positive to continue the trend onward and upward.

I intend to start a movement (however small) where we celebrate our accomplishments. We have so much to be proud of. There are great things going on in our schools and in our lives because of our efforts. Because of things that we do, the world is a better place. The rest of this week's blog will be used to celebrate things that happen because of me.

Because of me, my beautiful, selfless wife has someone to be her best friend. She has someone who supports her 100%. Because of me, she does not need to worry if she is loved or if anyone is on her side. She has someone who will help her decompress from a long day. She has someone who will tell her the truth and maybe an occasional white lie. Because of me, she has someone who encourages her professionally. She has someone who helps her with household chores. She has someone who will help her bathe children, cook dinner, and wash dishes (one of my better talents). Because of me, my wife has an appreciation for sports. Because of me, my wife has been the champion of a fantasy football league. I make a difference in the life of my wife.

Because of me, my four sweet, wonderful children have someone who encourages them. Because of me, my children have someone who teaches them to be responsible. They have someone teach them to be good people. Someone to teach them to challenge themselves. They have someone who will make them email their teachers if they have a questions about an assignment. Because of me, my children have someone rooting for them at their soccer games (maybe even embarrass them a little) Because of me, my children have someone who reads to them. Because of me, my children know how to make fun of themselves. Because of me, my children have someone who plays with them. They have someone who tickles them. They have someone who chases them around the house. Because of me, my son has someone he can dominate at FIFA 17. I make a difference in the lives of my children.

Because of me, students at school have regular, positive interactions with an adult. They have someone who smiles at them. They have someone who gives them high fives. Because of me, students have someone who will search through the garbage can if they accidentally throw their glasses away at lunch. They have someone who will tie their shoes and get the knots out. They have someone who will fix their bookbags when the zippers get stuck. They have someone who celebrates their successes. Because of me, students at my school have at least one adult who loves them and wants great things for them. Because of me, students at my school will be disciplined fairly and respectfully. Because of me, students have someone who will notice them and give them kind words. I make a difference in the lives of the students at my school.

Because of me, my teachers will be greeted with a smile each day. Because of me, teachers will have an assistant principal who understands the blood, sweat, and tears that they put into their classrooms. They have someone who understands how much they care for their students. Because of me, teachers have someone who will encourage them to innovate. They will have someone who thinks a new idea is a great idea. Because of me, teachers have someone who will listen and support them. They have someone who will encourage them. They have an assistant principal who remembers what it is like to be a teacher. I make a difference in the lives of the teachers at my school.

As educators, we are constantly critical of ourselves. Sometimes we need to take a step back and realize the good we do for all the people we come in contact with throughout the day. Please take the time to share some of the wonderful that happens positive in your world because of you. Celebrate yourself. Give yourself a pat on the back. It will help you focus on why you do what you do. There are some awesome educators out there, far greater than me. I cannot wait to hear what they have to share. Use the hashtag #BCofMe. 

Be an #Eduhero with Crazy #EdSwag

My weekly post almost fell victim to negativity. My topic was going to be titled "Don't be a troll!" Luckily, my chrome book did not fall under the troll's bridge. It was close. I was going to blog away on the topic of teachers whose attitudes remind me that of trolls. Trolls are moody. They are snarky. They are not the teachers they want to be. They are teachers who under plan, plan boringly, or set up engagement free classrooms. I was going to blog away about trolls and say "don't be a troll." I was going to write a post about confronting trolls. If you see someone walking around with an angry face and their arms crossed stage an anti-troll intervention...OMG I am blogging about edu-trolls!!!

I came to the realization that there is just too much positive in the world of education right now to focus on the negative. It is not like a troll was going to read my blog anyway. I'd rather challenge all of my fellow educators to dare to chase their dreams. I am more excited about education than I have ever been before. With that being said here is my proverbial call to arms.

Be the educator you dream you are. You can be Ron Clark. You can be Dave Burgess. You can follow in the steps of your #eduhero. Heck, you can overshadow your #eduhero. You do not have to settle for mediocrity. You can be the best teacher in your school or even your district. More importantly you can be the best teacher your students could dream of, right now! You can be the best teammate. You can turn students on to learning. You can change the world one child at the time!

Coaches implore players to leave it all out on the court. I am imploring you to leave it all out on your classroom floors. When you shut your door in the afternoons or more likely early evenings. Walk away with pride in that you taught your butt off today and that no one in the world could have done it better. Carry yourself with #edswag because you know what a huge difference you make each day.

Don't be afraid to try an outside the box idea. George Couros challenges us to be creative inside the box. Do that, too. Start a new initiative at your school. Try a new instructional style. Dare to be exciting. See what happens when your students see you caught up in the excitement of your own lesson. Intricately plan your lessons. Think about every tiny detail of your lesson. Design your lessons so students do not want to miss out. Ask yourself; if my students did not have to be in my classroom would they choose to come anyway? How can I design my teaching so that students would hate to miss it? What parts of my room do they love? Which do they hate? How can I make it better?

Reach out and grab the positive. Overcome negativity. Be the educator that you want to be. You are in control of your educational destiny. I hope you choose to be an #eduhero with crazy #edcred. Breathe life into your classrooms, your teams, and your schools. Like Gandhi said, "Be the change you wish to see in the world." There is not a better time than today.

Writing this blog reminded me of a quote from Haim Ginott on the power of teachers. I hope it helps you reflect like it has for me.

"I've come to a frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. It's my personal approach that creates the climate. It's my daily mood that makes the weather. As a teacher, I possess a tremendous power to make a child's life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or dehumanized."